Pain. It’s all I feel now. Sad.
it is matt. i am sorry. why am i an existence. i am sorry for the dead space i bring to the tables. pulchritudinous and coward are my favorite words. want to feel how i feel when i listen to music? pick a band from this list: a day to remember, silverstein, evans blue, anberlin, fall out boy, the killers, the devil wears prada, onerepublic, crown the empire, attack attack, the pilot in you, miss may i, amyst, bring me the horizon, red, trivium, killswitch engage, rise against, asking alexandria, suicide silence, breaking benjamin, falling to grace, august burns red, 30 seconds to mars, cape the elephant, rammstien, red hot chili peppers, slipknot, sublime, abaddon, switchfoot, three days grace, paramore, seether, system of a down, avenged sevenfold, escape the fate. NOW that you have found a song, find it on YouTube click on your desired video. on the URL of that video (www.youtube.com/watch_____)
add the word "repeat" to the end of youtube so it looks like this (www.youtuberepeat.com/watch____) press enter and cry your eyes out to that song untill you fall asleep in a puddle of tears or from the complete hatred within yourself.
"I’m glad you don’t give me butterflies any more."
I will still Love You. No matter how much it hurts knowing you don’t.
I want to tell you that I Love You.
I sit back and watch others chase after you. Seeing what I used to be like when I was head over heals for you. It’s ridiculous. You sit there; playing every single one, picking individually for your own benefit. You disgust me with your actions. Always being loved, you’re a Siren. Enticing feelings and playing with them to your leisure. Things are better left unsaid but If I ever man up and tell you anything even if it means being called a bitch for the rest of my life, I want to say you’re a selfish spoiled bitch who is unpleasant and everything you say or do is indulging that makes us fall for you. I hate you, and I Love you, I’m stuck in a paradox and you’re the puppeteer. I hate you, but all the more, I Love You.
I run my path. I stare into the eyes of the wicked one. I share thoughts with the beholder. I contemplate every move I make. I am struck down into oblivion. I am set aside for further remorse. I cannot hold on any longer. Every second I wait the more I have to say. I am living a life full of commotion and filled with conniptions. Just please just let me go if not already and come forward and say it to my face. You are the one who has the might and will. I am the one who perishes away into a sobbing sea of mixed emotions. I tell you it’s okay; too simply see you happy. I write these posts compacted with emotional fears. Every moment you flash before me; my eye sockets begin to flutter. Your beauty is out of this world. Your pain you portray is simply overwhelming. If you ever read this and think of who it may be. Please take the time and realize that you’re not perfect in every way shape or form that I have told you that you were. Everyone has their imperfections. I have found mine. My number one weakness was and is still you. I can claim to Love. But who am I kidding. For what I once knew is gone with a fortune. I dread my thoughts and eyes away as I write this message. But will you know, that pounding inside my weak leaking heart there is an emotion not able to be described by any word. No word that can match any other; not even Love. I feel that for you. As I’ve said before it’s my mixed emotions. In which knowing so I hate you, I love you, I like you, I despise you, I care for you, I am annoyed with you, a ram-packed bottle of everything imaginable is what I have for you. If anyone has made it this far into this message. I congratulate you for one, being kind enough to take the time, and two for being understandable, or three, you had nothing better to do so why not. But if you’re that one person that this struck feelings into or, is the person that this is for. Please confront me and tell me something. If it’s to go away forever, or if it’s to be with me for a lifetime. No matter the statement please tell me something. I will say this once and once only, I am Sorry. Sorry for everything. Venting is complete and I wish you all a good and opportunistic days ahead. I love you all.
Could I try any harder to meet your needs? If so please give me a hint. I want to be yours.